Somewhere you wanted to be badly but couldn't, connected to an event by a great friend. Feeling selfish and unselfish and without direction, long long walk yesterday and meal with whole family, photos of flowers. Alcohol to numb into sleep. Missing someone you never had is strange, making up an impossible future in your head. Sea I need the today, to come away and wash away my thoughts an replace them with a focus on everything I do have.
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