Hole

DSCF1079, a photo by mord on Flickr.

Feelings I shouldn't have
Pain of craving
Wanting something so perfect
Scared of such loss
Excitement, joy, bliss and deep, deep sadness
I AM IN CONTROL AGAIN

craving

DSCF6356, a photo by mord on Flickr.

Even Through the darkest phase
Be it thick or thin
Always someone marches brave
Here beneath my skin

Constant craving
Has always been

Maybe a great magnet pulls
All souls towards truth
Or maybe it is life itself
That feeds wisdom
To it's youth
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/k/kd+lang/constant+craving_20077006.html ]
Constant craving
Has always been

Craving
Ah ha
Constant craving
Has always been

Constant craving
Has always been
Constant craving
Has always been

Craving
Ah ha
Constant Craving
Has always been
Has always been
Has always been
Has always been
Has always been
Has always been

loosing

DSCF8403, a photo by mord on Flickr.

I don't know what you're looking for
you haven't found it baby, that's for sure
You rip me up and spread me all around
in the dust of the deed of time

And this is not a case of lust, you see
it's not a matter of you versus of me
It's fine the way you want me on your own
but in the end it's always me alone

And I'm losing my favourite game
you're losing your mind again
I'm losing my baby
losing my favourite game

I only know what I've been working for
another you so I could love you more
I really thought that I could take you there
but my experiment is not getting us anywhere

I had a vision I could turn you right
a stupid mission and a lethal fight
I should have seen it when my hope was new
my heart is black and my body is blue

And I'm losing my favourite game
you're losing your mind again
I'm losing my favourite game
I've tried but you're still the same
I'm losing my baby
you're losing a saviour and a saint

I'm Nobody!

DSCF8444, a photo by mord on Flickr.

I'm Nobody! Who are you? (260) Emily Dickinson

I'm Nobody! Who are you?
Are you – Nobody – too?
Then there's a pair of us!
Don't tell! they'd advertise – you know!

How dreary – to be – Somebody!
How public – like a Frog –
To tell one's name – the livelong June –
To an admiring Bog!

Alone

DSCF8996, a photo by mord on Flickr.

Alone Edgar Allan Poe

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.
Then- in my childhood, in the dawn
Of a most stormy life- was drawn
From every depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain,
From the sun that round me rolled
In its autumn tint of gold,
From the lightning in the sky
As it passed me flying by,
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.

A list of sense ?

Green face, a photo by mord on Flickr.

I'm quick at silly stupid lists and taking the mickey out of other people's lists perhaps I should try real ones.

1. Stop drinking to numb, doesn't really work anyway.
2. Loose weight get fit, always feel better REMEMBER THIS!
3. More time outside as much time outside
4. Hide the technology ( cameras not included )
5. Work harder in work the day flies
6. New volunteering, make a difference anyway else
7. Draw and paint ( yes it will be awful )
8. More music , fill life with music
9. More live events
10. Stop the lists too controlled and planning just do stuff randomly,

I am a creep.

impossible future

Say ahhhhh..., a photo by mord on Flickr.

Somewhere you wanted to be badly but couldn't, connected to an event by a great friend. Feeling selfish and unselfish and without direction, long long walk yesterday and meal with whole family, photos of flowers. Alcohol to numb into sleep. Missing someone you never had is strange, making up an impossible future in your head. Sea I need the today, to come away and wash away my thoughts an replace them with a focus on everything I do have.